Always Live

McFadden’s, General Manager Damien Fuller, and Emily Rose Perfection have separated. Emily Rose was my favorite Lucky Charm… She still may be (although she has a crush of competition) my favorite platinum bunny, venue employee or non-employee, in this city… Her exodus is not merely disheartening…. Her exodus is devastating…

While We Were Away

From Columbus to Philadelphia, Lodge Bar Assistant General Manager Trevor Day advances his career. Mike Material supplants him. Kattie Minx renounces her superstar slinger status. McFadden’s, General Manager Damien Fuller, and Emily Rose Perfection separate… Gossip CBUS has been away awhile…

We’ve returned and Always Live will recount what we’ve missed…

Reasons to Relish & Resign

People don’t appreciate the human aspect of this website. The bunny chasers and bunnies, their random actions and fashion, are column material, but they are vastly anonymous. The venues are column material, but they are vastly inanimate. It’s the natural slingers, the camaraderie and friendship, the moments you read and the stories you never will, that make this website.

Tonight, Thursday Night Live experienced it’s second edition. I promise we will discuss the occurrences and results… However, this was an evening when winners were nonexistent. This was an evening when the squad atop the scoreboard didn’t defeat their opponents; they merely outscored them.

While the clutches were scattered and unmemorable, DJ Legend and DJ Samurai were exquisite. Last week, DJ Samurai was patterned and predictable. This evening, DJ Legend’s creativity was equaled… DJ Legend mixed “Love Story” dance remix… DJ Samurai responded with an “Other Side” dance remix. DJ Legend spun “How Do You Sleep” and “Summer Girls.” DJ Samurai responded with “Poker Face” over the “Rocky Theme.”

The clash was an auditory delight. If only the crowd could have merited this skirmish… Pre-game, Lodge Bar appeared to enjoy a minimal advantage. In-game, Sugar Bar scored the initial round, although their swarm induced wincing (and only some of it was mine)… Particularly putrid was their stage, which was inhabited by an amount of weight not seen since the NFL Draft’s top ten selections…

While the heifers were horrific, Emily Rose Perfection’s presence made their repulsiveness invisible. I know I typed that Emily Rose is my favorite Lucky Charm… She may be (although she has a crush of competition) my favorite platinum bunny, venue employee or non-employee, in this city… It’s not simply her fashion (green and white top, form flattering white shorts)… It’s not simply her eighteen carat personality… It’s not simply her thirty-six carat appearance… It’s the elegant, precocious, and scandalous combination of the trio…

From the moment she arrived to the moment she messed up my hair, Emily’s glamour and magnetism were omnipresent… I typed this once with another superstar, but at this moment, the verbiage is transferable… You think ultimately, I would run out of adjectives for her, but every moment, Emily Rose’s personality amazes me…

In the second round, the crowd continued to disappoint me… While Sugar Bar scored the sequence on numbers, Lodge Bar possessed almost every platinum bunny (except Emily Rose)… The venues were polar opposites with similar attributes… Lodge Bar with every morsel and zero mass… Sugar Bar with an impressive mass and zero morsels…

Since I mentioned morsels, I must spend several sentences adoring Sugar Bar Promotions Superstar Whitney Allure, who has accomplished in six evenings, what some bunnies amass six weeks attempting… She has captivated and ensorcelled my attention…

It’s not merely her appearance, which is understatedly scrumptious… It is her intoxicating personality, which compels one to flirt with her, respect her, snuggle with her, and speak with her… You spend five minutes with Whitney; you want to spend twenty minutes… You spend twenty minutes with her; you want to spend twenty hours…

With this evening’s masses, I wanted to spend about thirty seconds less than thirty seconds… Sugar Bar completed their domination and scored a shutout… However, they should not salute or savor this triumph… If this were last week or Lodge Bar could have scraped together (and by scraped together, I mean admit anyone they could find) a crowd, Sugar Bar’s random recital might not have sufficed…

As the evening concluded, my twitter updates abruptly concluded, when I heard the most incomprehensible news… Crown Princess Kadi and Lodge Bar have separated… Crown Princess Kadi was this website’s initial superstar… She was the most referenced superstar and the first person I dealt with on an everyday basis… Her exodus is not merely disheartening…. Her exodus is devastating…

As I walked Vine Street at the conclusion of my evening, I strode with two thoughts… The first was obvious; this will likely be Crown Princess Kadi’s final mention in my column… The second was much more complex…

In the eyes and minds of venue executives, the natural slingers are akin to cattle… They are acquired, raised, and slaughtered without compassion or concern… In my eyes, they are the entire attraction… They are not a reason this website succeeds… They are the reason…

Skirts, Stars Score Spotlight

Life’s objective is the spotlight. The reason celebrities are idolized and millionaires are rich is they adore the spotlight. They relish the spotlight. Their ambitions were never anonymity, conformity, or obscurity. That’s the thing about the spotlight. It will never seek you. You must seek it.

Upon my arrival for the Luau, McFadden’s was swarmed. Given Greek Week’s volume of activity and the unwelcome weather (when did May become this city’s official rain month), one would assume campus might relax. Instead, those who consumed alcohol all week ignored the rain and consumed alcohol one more evening.

And they consumed their alcohol inside an immaculately contrived paradise. It’s not as if McFadden’s had not transformed their interior previously… However, their conversion from campus haunt into a Jimmy Buffett lyric was remarkable. The first level crowd batting an oversized beach ball into several breakable objects… The second level crowd purchasing their pounders from a beer tub, which was remade into straw encircled hut… The décor was spectacular…

Once again, McFadden’s Promotions Superstar Amy scored. It is obvious at this point that she is a star among stars… With that said, her individual genius is almost incomprehensible… Lodge Bar and Jen Bunny have Kattie Minx… Park Street Patio, Sugar Bar, and Randy Haffey have a quartet… Amy is singular… She must conceive and execute the concept… If the concept collapses, she cannot sacrifice anyone… She is responsible…

Yet, the concepts never collapse… Amy’s presentations are consistently intriguing… Her visions are consistently unique… From New Year’s Eve to St. Patrick’s Day to both Little Black Dress Parties, Amy conceives the event… She promotes the event… And the bunnies and bunny chasers arrive and enjoy…

On this evening, they were thoroughly enjoying… From the limbo contest that included two dozen to the two bunnies who danced atop a booth, the energy was excellent. Incidentally, the bunnies were chased off their booth by bouncers, five minutes after they commenced… I assume the reason was safety, but the bouncers should have relaxed… The visual was spectacular…

Equally spectacular was Lester, who (for once) enhanced and did not detract from the atmosphere. Typically, Lester’s randomness, which includes an obligatory once an evening salute to President Obama, is revolting (we understand, he won, you supported him)… Tonight, Lester was superb… His conclusion of the limbo contest with “On A Boat” was appropriate… His transition of “Sweet Caroline” into “Paper Planes” was stellar…

Since we mentioned stellar, the immersion of the Lucky Charms into the Luau theme was exquisite… The combination of bikinis and grass skirts… The allure of skin, which was equal parts appropriate, enticing, and scandalous… The Lucky Charms are marvelous morsels on average evenings… With this ensemble, their magnetism was inconceivable…

Of course, my personal favorite Emily Rose was scrumptious… It wasn’t the obvious with her either… Her perfect physique was striking… She was every male’s aspiration… However, Brooke and Sytease were equally physically appetizing… Emily Rose’s flawlessly bronzed skin… Her off the beach complexion, which exquisitely offset her hair and eyes… As I have said, the term OUS was coined for Emily Rose and this evening was the perfect explanation as to why…

While Emily Rose, Brooke, and Sytease were marvelous, the charm that captured my attention, the charm that captivated my attention was the newest addition to the muffin menagerie, Alisha… I could have observed the obvious with her and had enough verbiage for two paragraphs, but what made her relevant, what catapulted her ahead in the conversation, was when she walked the bar.

I know what you’re thinking, charms walk the bar, they grind, they preen, they strut… It’s essentially their employment description… I will not argue any of that… However, watching Alisha, who could have simply walked the crowd and labeled her night successful, reminded me why McFadden’s is the campus venue… Alisha appeared relaxed… She appeared to be relishing the attention, as she reaffirmed my opening paragraph…

Throughout the evening, I had several conversations, whose essential premise was that McFadden’s has slowed since football season… While the upper and lower levels might not be impassible, while the Arena District may be consuming most of this website’s column inches, Alisha’s performance negated this premise… Crowd size is irrelevant… Number of columns is irrelevant… McFadden’s remains the official home of spotlight seekers now and forever…

Uninformed Crowd Celebrates Unknown Holidays

Franklin County’s Hispanic-American population is 2.2%. Ninety-seven percent of our residents have no connection with Cinco de Mayo. They are unaware the holiday commemorates the Mexican Army’s victory over the French at the Battle of Puebla. They merely view the occasion as an opportunity to get drunk.

Judging McFadden’s crowd upon my arrival, the opportunity isn’t that important. The crowd was notable… The venue wasn’t vacant… Still, one could enjoy a conversation, hear themselves think, order and receive a drink within one minute, and walk freely across both level’s floors… Activities that are virtually impossible on McFadden’s greatest nights…

Thankfully, the crowd’s late arrival (and they would arrive) provided me an opportunity to speak with McFadden’s Promotions Superstar Amy, who I relish talking with. I know I’ve discussed other promotions superstars and it’s not that Amy’s more talented… It’s her personality… A brilliant blend of colleague and confidant… She is someone you can spend forty minutes with switching from life to work and back again in alternating sentences…

And tonight’s forty minutes were appreciated, because they allowed the crowd to improve… I exited our conversation and returned to the second level where the crowd was now buzzing… It wasn’t a signature McFadden’s crowd, as I spoke with Anastasia, one of McFadden’s greatest bartenders and the first bartender to serve me a drink in this city, the four tasks I mentioned earlier, were becoming more difficult…

As the influx progressed, the Lucky Charms (you didn’t think I would make it through a McFadden’s column without mentioning them…) prepared… Obviously, preparation is inherent with any facet of venue activity… However, watching Garren prep her beer tub was watching a pitcher prep the mound on the day of their critical start… Her expression was serious… Her movements were precise… She wanted the table a certain place, the chairs a certain way… The intricacy was incredible…

Speaking of incredible, I also couldn’t let a McFadden’s column conclude (and don’t worry we have a few paragraphs after this) without mentioning my favorite charm (typed it again) Emily Rose… Her pre-jello shot sale preparation consisted of debating whether or not to wear Dustin’s sombrero… After she decided against it, she sold the shots with her typical blend of audacity and charm… (I’m assuming Emily has never been accused of shyness)…

Contrasting Emily’s charm were the heifers whose numbers increased as McFadden’s crowd expanded… On both levels, in every area, there was more blubber present than the last Discovery Channel wale special… And their fashion was even worse… Peculiar colors… Random patterns… No less than fifty instances, I wanted to walk up to one of these and asked a simple question… Who shot my couch or my curtains or my bedspread?

Now, I know I will receive comments or e-mails, so let me type this (something I have been meaning to type previously)… I’ve been asked the question whether or not I don’t think heifers have a right to a social life… They absolutely have the right… However, I have the right to mock them… I have the right to point out that they should skip the forth doughnut or the second carton of ice cream or they should watch the Style Network… If they are trotting themselves into public dressed absurdly and appearing absurdly, I have the right to call their dress and appearance what they are…

As I exited McFadden’s en route to the second Dos de Mayo (which is ironically another holiday) celebration, I walked two thoughts… If this was Cinco de Mayo pre-game, what will Tuesday actually include… And did my couch, curtains, and bedspread pass away quickly or did they suffer?

Bunnies, Charms, and Heifers Inspire Thoughts

The internal conversations of this city must be fascinating. The confidence and confusion, the persuasion and opposition, the ignorance and veracity… If only one could somehow monitor this confidential and constant inner-twitter.

Upon my arrival for the Little Black Dress Party, McFadden’s was crushed. The first floor had a minimal walkway (which is unusual)… The second floor was equally impassible… And both patios were swarmed, as the boys and bunnies (and believe me, there were bunnies, with and without black dresses) conversed and danced in the delicious mid-April air…

These evenings, without hesitation, are my favorite in this city… The cold and gray of winter is vanished, but it is not yet summer, so every random is not crammed into a ten block radius… These are the select evenings, when one can venture into the city, savor the sixty and seventy-plus weather, and enjoy the pre-summer hangover and hookup opportunities…

As I walked from the second floor onto the first and into a conversation with McFadden’s Promotions Superstar Amy, I can’t imagine her thoughts as she greeted the happy hour patrons and observed the throng which they immersed into… McFadden’s is a college venue and college students crave alcohol, circumstances and theme be damned… Amy could simply conceptualize cheap drink specials and call it a job… But, she doesn’t… Every week, she conceptualizes and executes some of the most impressive and intriguing events I attend or am invited to… (and she’s a bunny also)…

As always, a collection of non-bunnies were visible among the sexy and scrumptious which populated McFadden’s pair of floors… Actually, I’m stunned their was room for anyone sexy or scrumptious, given the sheer mass of some of these refrigerator shaped heifers… (Save your comments and e-mails)… I can’t imagine their rationalization, as they stand in their closets or sit in front of their mirrors and dress themselves in clothes they know they can’t wear, which they know will repulse people (and when I say people, I don’t just mean myself)…

The amount of skin they flash, from their pants cut just low enough to make one gag to their heifer cleavage, must cross their mind as unacceptable… They must say to themselves, the people who sell them the clothes must say to them, heifer, black dresses just aren’t meant for some… Still, they cover their refrigerator shaped bodies in throw rug clothing and steal attention from the bunnies…

Thankfully, there remain some bunnies who the heifers can’t overshadow… On this night (as on most nights), the brightest bunnies, the bunnies who could not be eclipsed, were the Lucky Charms… Sytease’s mind must be incredible… She’s the charm’s leader… Every evening, she has dozens of details to organize… Yet, she is the most adorable and approachable person you would ever wish to meet (and as I said on twitter, no bunny over 5’5 can rock a black dress like she can)…

Speaking of bunnies who can rock a black dress and minds which must be incredible… Brooke’s energy, personality, and splendor continue to captivate… What I said about her off the rack quality would be sufficient… But, as I watched her sell jello shots and dance and lip sync, she is simply implausible… She is gorgeous, I assume she knows as much and she must know that every male eye is on her when she enters a room… Yet, she proves herself worth the attention…

Also worth attention is the exquisite Emily Rose… I hadn’t seen her since St. Patrick’s Day and obviously I had written a volume about other charms since… But, within thirty seconds of seeing her smile, seeing her spectacular hair style, and hearing that enchanting rasp in her voice, I was reminded why no charm compares with her… There are bunnies in this city… There are platinum bunnies in this city… But, the phrase OUS, was minted for Emily Rose…

In a nutshell, seeing Emily, seeing Brooke, Sytease, Amy or any of the other two dozen bunnies in black dresses are why I, as I exited the venue, thanked myself for another late evening… You can’t imagine how many nights I think about staying home… But, then I come to my senses and give myself a good kick in the ass… And I never regret not staying home…

Five, Fun, & Fantastic

St. Patrick’s Day is unique… Before you reactively agree with or roll your eyes at that statement, consider the obvious… On the Saturday proceeding New Year’s Eve, venues do not host events and label the activities “Pre-Ball Drop Day.”

Given the aforesaid, I moderated my expectations prior to Tuesday evening… Saturday was St. Practice Day… Monday was Pre-Patty Day and both evenings were very well attended… It’s Tuesday, we’re approaching the middle of the work week when our minds mush and our focus evaporates and a hangover is not the obvious injection… As I walked Park Street toward Callahan’s, I knew the Irish themed venue would host a crowd… However, my expectations for the evening were tempered…

Callahan’s quickly made me rethink my tempered expectations… As I said, I knew the venue would have a crowd (It’s name is Callahan’s and it’s St. Patrick’s Day)… With that said, the bar was crushed, the energy was intense, and the cluster of green clad bunnies was exquisite… Bunnies munching pizza and dancing… Bunnies who used their Coach purses to match their outfits… The clusters were scrumptious….

They paled in comparison (I can’t believe I am saying this) to the experience I would have minutes later, when I encountered DJ Legend… Now, I had met DJ Legend previously, and he is an outstanding individual… However, I had no clue that he would score me complete access to the venue (which I had never been in and I appreciated)…

We walked up the stairs and a moment later, I was in Callahan’s immaculate top floor club… I can just imagine what the venue resembles on a Friday night when Legend is at the top of his game… We walk through the club and outside onto a rooftop, which apparently, will be converted into a rooftop club… (How sick is that?)… As nearly thirty minutes passed, we stood atop that roof, discussing all manner of promotions… simply two power players looking out onto our city…

Following that conversation, I darted across the street to Park Street Patio, which finally resembled it’s name with a shrunken indoor crowd, a stellar outdoor crowd, and an outstanding DJ spinning in open air… The energy was slightly relaxed and the communal experience of Park Street Patio was slightly less enthralling than the crushed cluster experience of Callahan’s… Yet, the atmosphere would easily trump what I would view later in the evening…

Additionally, (and I love this about the venue), you cannot ignore the excellent intrapersonal skills of Park Street Patio’s management… From Co-Owner Brian Swanson and Promotions Superstars Randy and Tori, the attention, the collegial interaction, is a benefit you cannot encounter at every venue… Especially Tori, a personal favorite, whose five minute conversation, you wish you could turn into fifty…

From Callahan’s crush and Park Street Patio’s community, I walked Vine Street into Lodge Bar and a complete surprise… Now, you read about Lodge Mardi Gras and I will personally divulge that they owned St. Practice Day… But, their crowd on Tuesday, didn’t net them the top of the medal stand… In fact, it was in a fist fight for the lowest spot on the medal stand…

Lodge Bar was busy… The bunnies were copious… and the favorites (with the exception of the Crown Princess) were working, but the energy, the overall encompassing vibe which Lodge has previously produced was absent… It is as simple as this… Lodge Mardi Gras was equivalent to Usain Bolt’s one hundred meter final… Tuesday night resembled a qualifying heat…

I will compliment Lodge Bar on their excellent choice of music however… Featuring a diverse set list and impressive crowd interaction, the Bling Crosby’s were worth every moment spent at the venue… The two man venue is not unlike some acts that have been featured at Lodge… With that said, their individuality made them an act worth mentioning… (Their debut CD drops soon, I will let you know if I get a chance to react)…

A venue not worth attending, mentioning, and I assume, for them, not worth opening on this evening was the Frog Bear and Wild Boar, which conceded the lackluster evening prior to midnight… When I arrived at the fourth of five venues, the lights were on, the chairs were on the tables, and the evening was over… I don’t know why people didn’t come out to the Arena District on this evening…

People did more than come out to McFadden’s… They mashed the venue… As I walked South Campus toward the location, the upstairs and downstairs patios were crushed, making me elated that I selected McFadden’s as my final experience… The craziness I expected from their day’s worth of events and the updates I had been receiving throughout the evening did justice to the madness which was still rocking as I arrived…

The split level energy was unbelievable… Downstairs, the DJ and the dance floor displayed the energy you crave from campus… Upstairs, the band (whose name escapes me at the moment, thus, if they are reading this, I apologize), owned the conversation with an eclectic set list that included “Peaches” and “Under the Bridge.” While I have heard both college and rock sound in this city, I have not encountered the charismatic force which was displayed by this band… They were stellar…

Equally stellar was the complete chaos and the bunnies encircling it… From a drunken Lucky Charm Sytease to Allie, to the always delectable Emily Rose, to the scores of bunnies that were rocking the dance floor, McFadden’s concluded my evening as it had commenced, as it should always conclude and commence, with a bunny crawl…

Five venues, 2.20 miles traveled, a hundred hands shaken, two hundred friends or acquaintances encountered, five hundred or more bunnies, and a thousand random drunken details… Simply stated, the reality crushed the expectations…

Black, Bunnies, & Free Agent Bartenders

For the boys and bunnies that populate McFadden’s each evening, their attraction is the intoxicants, which inhabit bottles or clear plastic cups. For myself, the bartenders, managers, security, and staff are the attractions…

Upon my arrival for the Blackout Bash, I made a pair of rapid observations… Not everyone received the multiple e-mails and promos about wearing black (seriously, can you people read?) and whomever spent the afternoon decorating the venue, deserves free drinks for the next three months…

I know I gushed about McFadden’s New Year’s interior… However, Saturday night’s enhancement was more impressive and more unique… For this evening, you weren’t in McFadden’s, where spilled beer and thrown napkins stain the floor… You stepped into a quasi-cross between an Abercrombie and Fitch catalog full of photography (on the screens and arrayed in still montages throughout the venue) and a premier nightclub… Black draped curtains, elegant lighting, and enchanting stars…

Troy McKinley, the host of the party, and from what sources have told me, the concept artist behind the design managed the unthinkable… It’s not like McFadden’s hasn’t hosted a theme party before, they host one a week… He (in my opinion), masterminded a memorable evening… An even more memorable evening than New Year’s Eve, which I would have thought impossible…

McKinley, while genius, cannot take all the credit… The attire and the bunnies that showcased that attire, also created the evening… Now, I could spend hours setting up what I am about to type… I could discuss the mythology of the little black dress and it’s prominence in womanhood and how nothing (and I mean nothing) looks better on a bunny than the perfect black dress, but, instead, I will simply type the obvious… The troves and troves of bunnies (and they were everywhere) made this night…

From the silk-lace ensemble worn by one of the bartenders to the red and black flower print (with red shoes) worn by a customer bunny to Amy’s (McFadden’s Promotions Manager) low cut black dress to the hundred other different patterns and textures, the glamorous dresses and the gorgeous bunnies who exuded sex with every moment, were enough to turn observers into bunny hunters and hunters into stalkers… Compliment those dresses with the glow sticks, which McKinley was nice enough to provide and the evening found a whole new category of perfect…

Speaking of perfect… I know I have discussed the Lucky Charms previously, McFadden’s own combination of customer conversationalists and shot sellers, but I must discuss them anew for two reasons… The first reason being there are additions to the ensemble and the second reason being their brilliant role in this perfect event… Sytease (the leader of the collection) was stunning in her full-length black ensemble and silver necklace… And the rest of the Charms, who, from my information, sold an impressive number of pounders, jello and test tube shots, were equally impressive…

With that said, Brooke merits special mention… With the persona of a pre-psychotic Britney Spears and the flawless blonde hair and face of Hayden Panettiere, Brooke (although I only spent two minutes speaking with her), could rival Sytease or Emily Rose as McFadden’s hottest charm…

As midnight approached and the crowd, which began the night as impressive and swelled toward ridiculous, continued exerting phenomenal energy, two dozen (yes 24) bunnies overran the bar for a quartet of songs that included, appropriately, “Single Ladies.” I assume the bunnies (a few of whom were larger bunnies), would have occupied the space for the evening, but alas, they were asked to dismount so that jewelry could be awarded….

And then, McFadden’s made their one mistake of this evening… They never announced that the jewelry was being awarded… They announced ten minutes remaining until… five minutes remaining until… But, they never announced the actual start of the awarding… A half an hour after the five-minute call, I see a bunny (and this one was a bunny), carrying a little black bag, which I knew was one of the jewelry prizes… What the… Now, don’t misunderstand me, this was a monumental evening and the fact that an announcement was not made was minor, but still… I was writing about the event, the prizes were a focal point of the event… It would have been nice if someone had told me…

It also would have been nice if I had known prior to the evening that this was Karl’s last night at McFadden’s… I would have prepared a tribute video (alright, I am just kidding)… Like Taryn before him, Karl walked the bar one final time… Unlike Taryn, his hair was down and crazy and his soundtrack was “Welcome to the Jungle…” Karl shook, he strutted, he scorched more than a few willing throats with shots, and then he spent the next two hours with Lester taunting him with farewell selections, including “Total Eclipse of the Heart…”

Now, I assume you’re waiting for a sentimental salute to Karl… You wont get one… It turns out that while Taryn joined the real world, Karl is merely exiting one opportunity for another… Sources tell me he is relocating to Park Street Patio…

I don’t know if I will see him as much, but I know this… When a free agent leaves one franchise for another, my respect for that free agent doesn’t diminish… The same is true when one bartending superstar walks out from behind one bar, only to step behind another…

Colt, Texas Break Buckeye Hearts

Since I can remember, I have been a sports fan. Baseball, football, basketball, hockey, golf, tennis, auto racing… I have seen thousands of contests… The great wins escape me… The satisfaction of the moment vanishes within a week… The blowout losses, I forget almost instantly (thank you alcohol)… Games like tonight, heart twisting losses, I still remember every decisive moment years after they are played… I have no doubt that on January 5, 2029; I will be able to recite, with agonizing detail, my emotions and the moments of January 5, 2009.

Normally, one cannot see the floor as they navigate through McFadden’s… Tonight, one could see the floor, the tables, and out the windows if they chose to stare long enough… The crowd was smaller… You couldn’t find a chair if you wanted one… With that said, their intensity was exquisite… From the opening kickoff to the final incompletion, they hung on every snap… Celebrating, cheering, cursing, and screaming…

There was a pulse and energy, which was uniquely McFadden’s… The size of the crowd was irrelevant… You could have put a larger crowd in a room of the same size and the communal intensity of this evening could not be matched… For four quarters, I watched the game among friends and total strangers, each of whom craved a victory as much, if not more than I did…

When you watch any game with friends, inane conversations, conversations you look back on and ask why they were had, are inevitable… As Brutus – South Campus version, made the rounds (posing for pictures, hugging the bunnies), one of those conversations occurred between Emily and Sytease… Both are bunnies, both are employed by McFadden’s, and both look like they won the genetic lottery… Yet, as the second half of the second quarter unfolds, they stood there talking about what was wrong with themselves… Let me say, there is nothing wrong with either and if there is a male who does find something wrong with them, they should spend a few quality hours in the OSU Medical Center…

Equally as intriguing (and confusing) was this story I must tell, the story about a girl named Lucky (yes, before anyone google’s it, that is the opening line to a Britney Spears song)… Why am I calling her Lucky? Because I don’t want to reveal her real name and because she actually reminds me of the girl in that song…

Lucky has a boyfriend, but not really, a guy she dates (the same one), but they fight a lot, so I guess this makes her technically single, but she doesn’t go out with anyone else, but she is married on a social networking site to one of her gay friends… If you are lost reading that, it’s not because you are hung over, its because its random as hell…

As the second half progressed, initially with Texas dominating into a 17-6 lead, then into an energy intoxicating comeback as Ohio State pushed ahead 21-17, the passion and the quirkiness of everyone watching was on full display… mine included… I don’t know how you are when you watch a game, but I can’t sit still… I leaned onto a friend, who for luck was holding onto his buckeye necklace the whole time… The bouncer bit his lip; the bunny bartender stared toward the television and then buried her head in her coworker’s shoulder… The intensity of those moments was everything this city is about and nothing that this city could deal with… And then it happened… The strains of Don’t Stop Believing (which was, I thought, an appropriate choice, as it sends the signal that there is always next year) began and the bar began to let out with our season over at 10-3…

I have to update one situation prior to close… I mentioned on twitter that were multiple police cars outside of McFadden’s… there were six… for what I do not know, as only one arrest was made… and as I left, there were multiple police in front of the South Campus garage… clearly something went or was going down, that I have no idea about…

I know some of you are to this point in the reading and you’re asking yourself, why didn’t he talk about the game… I could’ve spent this entire wrap analyzing, lamenting, and rehashing… but why? We all watched the game or followed the game on twitter… Why double the sour taste we already have in our mouths? Why heap additional disappointment onto what was clearly a disappointing season?

Taryn’s Last Shot

McFadden’s is, without question (and if I have said this before I apologize), one of the most unique venues in this city… Why is this? You never know quite what to expect… You never what might happen within any given minute… This is what draws you in, makes you walk from campus or the South Gateway garage in the freezing cold… And this is what makes you not want to leave… You don’t want to miss what happens next… You don’t want to be the one to hear the second hand story of the fight or the drama or the favorite bartenders final evening…

When this night started, it looked as though five minutes could be a useless stay… I thought last night was lazy… This night began with a dozen or so coffee cloches, circles of a half dozen friends talking and enjoying their happy hours, nut nothing else… No vibe, no energy… I assumed everyone was done with finals and here everyone was acting as though they had three tomorrow… An hour into the night, I was thinking of bailing for Sugar Bar (hey, free alcohol is free alcohol)… Then it happened…

I was checking my cell and someone approached me, someone who I had never met before (not unusual, I am Gossip Cbus)… He asked me, “Are you here for a happy hour with anyone?”

I said no… He then explained the happy hour process to me (which I found helpful, because if you read this blog, you know I’ve never been to McFadden’s before) and told me that I should go to the promotions person (Amy), tell her I was with him and then he would be one person closer to scoring a gift certificate… Now, I’ve been to McFadden’s a dozen times since football season started… But I’ve never had someone try to recruit me for a happy hour… Yes, I know, I said it… free alcohol is free alcohol and a gift certificate to McFadden’s would be well worth it… But, seriously, recruiting for happy hour?

About twenty minutes later, Woody (chief of security and a great person) and entourage entered for Woody’s birthday celebration… This turned the night from semi-interesting to officially interesting… The drinks started flowing, the energy increased, and finally, two hours into the night, McFadden’s was McFadden’s… As the night improved, a rumor started making it’s the way through the air… a rumor which eventually made it’s way to me and I was able to confirm… I’ll have the breaking news soon….

Several random conversations later, I run into Tad, another bouncer at McFadden’s and one of their very best people… After about four minutes of talk, a girl, I cannot use the word bunny as she wasn’t and I’d have to retire the word if I did use it for her, approached Tad… The chunky, drunken, leopard print wearing mess puts her arms around Tad and says “You look like you need a girl.” (I’m sure Tad did, but girl and wildebeest are two entirely different things)… There was a brief exchange, the girl apparently didn’t like the tone of the conversation and she split… At this point Tad gave me a look like, that one was entirely to drunk…

Imagine my surprise when twenty minutes later, the girl, crouched down first in a booth and then on a table, has to literally be carried out by two people… I was shocked (sarcasm duly noted)… The leopard disaster was followed five minutes later by another girl, carried out the door by a bouncer… People, if you cant handle your alcohol, don’t get drunk with people, and get drunk alone… Stay home, so I’m not forced (believe me its my pleasure) to mock you…

Amidst the overly intoxicated non-bunnies, Woody hit the bar to buy shots… Let me repeat that, Woody (who I must again say happy birthday to) hit the bar to buy shots… I am told we will have pictures tomorrow… After only a few moments, Woody was replaced (and though I like Woody, I must at this point say THANK GOD) by bunnies… A dozen bunnies, smiling, grinding, and shaking their asses… It was the moment everyone had been waiting for and it was summarized perfectly by Tad, “I love this job,” he says (he wasn’t even working tonight!).

As the dozen bunnies rocked the bar, I have to say that the two most impressive were the Lucky Charms… I know I haven’t mentioned either Sytease or Emily before, but they are outstanding… They are gorgeous, the work hard, and I know my opinion of their dancing was limited to what I saw on the bar, but I was impressed….

Speaking of random acts on the bar… Lester, who had been calling for graduating seniors all night, finally abandoned that call in a most unusual way… He took McFadden’s country… (No, I’m not kidding)… Garth Brooks, Dueling Banjos, Big and Rich and the song that stole the show… The Devil Went Down to Georgia (Charlie Daniels Band), complete with Paul, Jackson, Lester, and a friend on the bar playing (and I use that word loosely) what were supposed to be instruments (in reality, whatever was laying around behind the bar that they could get their hands on)… They posed, they acted… It was easily the most bizarre and entertaining moment of the evening…

The most poignant moment of the evening? In one word… Taryn… When I arrived tonight, I found out that this was her last night… (Unthinkable… These superstars actually move into our world and have real jobs?). On her last night, Taryn came dressed to remember, red Santa hat, red top, and a sash that read retired… As I watched her walk the bar, only moments before I left, shaking, buying free shots, I couldn’t help but think of all those moments and when she seemingly had customers eating (or drinking( out of the palm of her hand…

I left before close, but I can only imagine, as she counts out her tips and walks to her car for the last time tonight, what it must be like for her and what it will be like for the rest of us without her… Taryn, we will miss you… When you were good, you were the best we could watch… You were a superstar…