Love Always Live? Love our columns? Don’t follow our twitter? You should and here’s your motivation… Starting tonight, Gossip CBUS will reserve specific evenings. On these evenings, twitter will be your one and only resource. No column will be written….
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Twitter Live Only
Love Always Live? Love our columns? Don’t follow our twitter? You should and here’s your motivation… Starting tonight, Gossip CBUS will reserve specific evenings. On these evenings, twitter will be your one and only resource. No column will be written….
Failure is Fleeting, Recovery is Remembered
One question I am frequently asked concerns personal relationships. Do they prevent criticism? My answer is simple and qualified. No they do not prevent criticism… However, I acquire no pleasure from scorching a venue.
If anyone was wondering why twitter live never commenced, my phone was uncooperative. If twitter live would have commenced, the tweets would have been few and unfavorable. McFadden’s Rock on the Range pre-party was vacant. I don’t mean the majority of the tables were unoccupied. I mean one could have sat down at any table, taken a nap, and no noise would have awoken you.
Thankfully, McFadden’s Promotions Superstar Amy Shimmer rescued the afternoon. I know I’ve discussed Amy’s individual genius, but her fashion is more impressive. Whether it’s New Year’s barely there blue dress or anyone of a half-dozen little black dresses she has rocked, Shimmer never concedes style… Couture is her comfortable.
Dressed today in sun drop yellow, she is once again scrumptious. Our conversation covers Pete Wentz, Kenny Chesney weekend, and the previously mentioned debacle… Amy is obviously unhappy with this afternoon… However, she comprehends what every superstar comprehends… Your next performance negates any performance…
When twitter originated, I didn’t understand it’s value… I can’t say good morning in one hundred and forty characters… I also rarely type a non double-digit paragraph column… As I walked toward the South Campus garage, I comprehended what every columnist comprehends… When nothing occurs, a lot can’t be said…
If anyone was wondering why twitter live never commenced, my phone was uncooperative. If twitter live would have commenced, the tweets would have been few and unfavorable. McFadden’s Rock on the Range pre-party was vacant. I don’t mean the majority of the tables were unoccupied. I mean one could have sat down at any table, taken a nap, and no noise would have awoken you.
Thankfully, McFadden’s Promotions Superstar Amy Shimmer rescued the afternoon. I know I’ve discussed Amy’s individual genius, but her fashion is more impressive. Whether it’s New Year’s barely there blue dress or anyone of a half-dozen little black dresses she has rocked, Shimmer never concedes style… Couture is her comfortable.
Dressed today in sun drop yellow, she is once again scrumptious. Our conversation covers Pete Wentz, Kenny Chesney weekend, and the previously mentioned debacle… Amy is obviously unhappy with this afternoon… However, she comprehends what every superstar comprehends… Your next performance negates any performance…
When twitter originated, I didn’t understand it’s value… I can’t say good morning in one hundred and forty characters… I also rarely type a non double-digit paragraph column… As I walked toward the South Campus garage, I comprehended what every columnist comprehends… When nothing occurs, a lot can’t be said…
Race for the Cure Raises $2 Million
NBC 4: Tens of thousands of Central Ohioans gathered in downtown Columbus Saturday for the 17th Komen Columbus Race for the Cure. A record-setting 45,546 people registered for the race, breaking the 2008 record of 40,266.
This year’s race was expected to raise $2 million for breast cancer research. Since the race began in Columbus in 1993, the event has raised nearly $13 million. Komen Columbus Executive Director Katie Carter said the Columbus race is the eighth largest Komen event in the country, ahead of cities such as Chicago and Philadelphia.
This year’s race was expected to raise $2 million for breast cancer research. Since the race began in Columbus in 1993, the event has raised nearly $13 million. Komen Columbus Executive Director Katie Carter said the Columbus race is the eighth largest Komen event in the country, ahead of cities such as Chicago and Philadelphia.
Numbers Sixty-Nine & Seventy
NBC 4: The Columbus Division of Police is currently on the scene of a reported shooting on the city’s northeast side. Homicide detectives have been called to investigate a shooting that happened just after 11 today.
NBC 4: On Friday evening close to 8:45 p.m., Columbus Police were called to the area of Woodland Avenue and Jermain Drive on a reported shooting. Upon their arrival, officers found a 17-year old man who was shot in the buttocks. The man told officers he was walking in the area when a black male driving a grey Chevy Impala drove past and shot him multiple times. The victim was transported to the hospital in stable condition where he was treated from his injuries.
NBC 4: On Friday evening close to 8:45 p.m., Columbus Police were called to the area of Woodland Avenue and Jermain Drive on a reported shooting. Upon their arrival, officers found a 17-year old man who was shot in the buttocks. The man told officers he was walking in the area when a black male driving a grey Chevy Impala drove past and shot him multiple times. The victim was transported to the hospital in stable condition where he was treated from his injuries.
INVITE: Rock on the Range Pre-Parties
Commencement: 3:00Conclusion: 6:00
Venue: McFadden’s (South Campus)
Rock on the Range Ticket Contest
Free Crew Stadium Concert Shuttle
Complementary Ultimate Vodka Drinks
Drinks (Available All Night)
$2.50 Bud Light
Quick Read
The front page and Sports lead appropriately with General Motors’ cuts and the Preakness respectively… If only the same could be said for metro… Mary Taylor skips a potential senatorial campaign and the section buries the story on B5…
Kevin Joy (Life and Arts) contributes a fascinating read on couch surfing, the practice of randoms crashing in each other’s homes…
Kevin Joy (Life and Arts) contributes a fascinating read on couch surfing, the practice of randoms crashing in each other’s homes…
Gonzo, Cheshire Create Callahan’s Contrast
Contrast is imperative. Cosmo Kramer is not hilarious without Jerry Seinfeld. Batman is not relevant without the Joker. Notorious B.I.G. is not successful without Sean “Puffy” Combs.
Upon my arrival at Callahan’s, the venue was scattered. The majority of the tables were occupied…. However, the second level, the main weekend event, wasn’t even open yet. As I stepped over the rope and traversed the stairs, I walked with one thought, would Gonzo receive the crowd he warranted?
I walked up the carpeted stairs, over the vacant wood floor, up another set of stairs and arrived inside the booth, where Gonzo was polishing his precision. Now, I know I just said the club was vacant and I know you’re thinking why would Gonzo work when minimal (if any) effort is required… That answer is simple… Mixing and spinning aren’t his hobby…
Despite an empty floor, Gonzo selected songs and worked the steel as if he were Chipper Jones, perfecting his swing in a stadium of empty seats… His eyes darted from the turntable to his case to his headphones, as he mapped his strategy… You could almost read his mind… Timing wasn’t important at the moment… Timing would become important…
As I marveled at Gonzo’s meticulous preparation, another person entered the booth… Instantly, I knew I recognized the person, but I could not recall when or if we had met… Two moments passed, glances were exchanged and finally, I sought the only identification means available… Gonzo and I exchanged whispers and I realized my own obliviousness… Standing within three feet of me, relaxed and texting, was the Cheshire Cat of this city, Drew Hanson…
Hanson and I swapped introductions, he complimented and critiqued this website, and we discussed several venues… Five minutes aren’t required to comprehend the Cheshire cat… Five seconds aren’t required… Hanson has opinions… He wants them shared… And if you agree, he doesn’t care… If you disagree, he really doesn’t care… Hanson’s blend of arrogant narcissism is equal parts amusing, entertaining, and incomprehensible…
I know I said this on twitter…. Yet, it is worth repeating as an encapsulation of Hanson… If confidence were cocaine, we would have discovered Hanson in a ditch at least a decade ago… Prominence produces ego and ego is productive…. Except, Hanson’s ego could encircle Ohio Stadium… (I know I am making him sound insufferable, but he was not and I assume he would make similar statements about his personality)…
I said a moment ago that while arrogantly narcissistic, Hanson is both amusing and entertaining… Whether encouraging mass consumption of a shot, dancing (and compelling you to dance), or repeating the same phrase multiple times, the Cheshire cat is the most dynamic and unique personality I have encountered in six months of this website… He was a column that wrote himself…
At approximately 11:30, Callahan’s finally removed the rope and opened the second level… The initial crowd was unspectacular… The heifers outnumbered the bunnies seven to one and no, that’s not a ratio, there was only one bunny… As I observed Gonzo, who had a triple digit temperature, who appeared as if he didn’t want to leave the stool for the next round (yes, that’s a boxing reference), my mind revisited my original question… Would he receive the crowd he warranted?
One hour subsequent, I received my answer… Despite a pedestrian start and an array of heifers, the dance floor improved… The second level improved… At approximately 12:30, Gonzo had the crowd he warranted and he savored every moment and morsel… As I darted between the booth and the floor, I observed the two components which were required… Scrumptious bunnies and energy…
In last night’s column (forget the subject for a moment), I typed that one knows when they have it… Gonzo knew he had it… Observing him after the swarm ensued was watching Manny Pacquiao in the second round… Gonzo mixed, he spun, he scratched, his hands noted the rhythm of the selection, his head noted the rhythm of the selection, he interacted with the crowd and the selection…
And his selections were exquisite… “This Is How We Do It,” “Poker Face,” “Lose Your Love,” “When I Grow Up,” and potentially the most incomprehensible mix ever… “Blister in the Sun” and “Insane in the Membrane…” Gonzo knew he had it and when you know, you don’t take a moment to reflect on your talent… You score every point you can…
While the aforesaid five selections were exemplary, Gonzo’s signature moment occurred only moments prior to my exit… With a crushed dance floor, Gonzo spun “Sugar” and the bunnies exploded… From floor level, the energy was as intense as any moment I have experienced… It rivaled when Donnie Wahlberg sang… The combination of crowd, skill, and sound were perfect….
The chorus, ripped from a regrettable pop song of this decade, echoed and you couldn’t not hear the screams… The entire evening, I had wondered would Gonzo receive the crowd he warranted? I concluded the evening at floor level, watching this crowd thank him for his skill… Gonzo may have had a triple digit temperature, but he contrasted it with unfathomable triple digit talent…
Upon my arrival at Callahan’s, the venue was scattered. The majority of the tables were occupied…. However, the second level, the main weekend event, wasn’t even open yet. As I stepped over the rope and traversed the stairs, I walked with one thought, would Gonzo receive the crowd he warranted?
I walked up the carpeted stairs, over the vacant wood floor, up another set of stairs and arrived inside the booth, where Gonzo was polishing his precision. Now, I know I just said the club was vacant and I know you’re thinking why would Gonzo work when minimal (if any) effort is required… That answer is simple… Mixing and spinning aren’t his hobby…
Despite an empty floor, Gonzo selected songs and worked the steel as if he were Chipper Jones, perfecting his swing in a stadium of empty seats… His eyes darted from the turntable to his case to his headphones, as he mapped his strategy… You could almost read his mind… Timing wasn’t important at the moment… Timing would become important…
As I marveled at Gonzo’s meticulous preparation, another person entered the booth… Instantly, I knew I recognized the person, but I could not recall when or if we had met… Two moments passed, glances were exchanged and finally, I sought the only identification means available… Gonzo and I exchanged whispers and I realized my own obliviousness… Standing within three feet of me, relaxed and texting, was the Cheshire Cat of this city, Drew Hanson…
Hanson and I swapped introductions, he complimented and critiqued this website, and we discussed several venues… Five minutes aren’t required to comprehend the Cheshire cat… Five seconds aren’t required… Hanson has opinions… He wants them shared… And if you agree, he doesn’t care… If you disagree, he really doesn’t care… Hanson’s blend of arrogant narcissism is equal parts amusing, entertaining, and incomprehensible…
I know I said this on twitter…. Yet, it is worth repeating as an encapsulation of Hanson… If confidence were cocaine, we would have discovered Hanson in a ditch at least a decade ago… Prominence produces ego and ego is productive…. Except, Hanson’s ego could encircle Ohio Stadium… (I know I am making him sound insufferable, but he was not and I assume he would make similar statements about his personality)…
I said a moment ago that while arrogantly narcissistic, Hanson is both amusing and entertaining… Whether encouraging mass consumption of a shot, dancing (and compelling you to dance), or repeating the same phrase multiple times, the Cheshire cat is the most dynamic and unique personality I have encountered in six months of this website… He was a column that wrote himself…
At approximately 11:30, Callahan’s finally removed the rope and opened the second level… The initial crowd was unspectacular… The heifers outnumbered the bunnies seven to one and no, that’s not a ratio, there was only one bunny… As I observed Gonzo, who had a triple digit temperature, who appeared as if he didn’t want to leave the stool for the next round (yes, that’s a boxing reference), my mind revisited my original question… Would he receive the crowd he warranted?
One hour subsequent, I received my answer… Despite a pedestrian start and an array of heifers, the dance floor improved… The second level improved… At approximately 12:30, Gonzo had the crowd he warranted and he savored every moment and morsel… As I darted between the booth and the floor, I observed the two components which were required… Scrumptious bunnies and energy…
In last night’s column (forget the subject for a moment), I typed that one knows when they have it… Gonzo knew he had it… Observing him after the swarm ensued was watching Manny Pacquiao in the second round… Gonzo mixed, he spun, he scratched, his hands noted the rhythm of the selection, his head noted the rhythm of the selection, he interacted with the crowd and the selection…
And his selections were exquisite… “This Is How We Do It,” “Poker Face,” “Lose Your Love,” “When I Grow Up,” and potentially the most incomprehensible mix ever… “Blister in the Sun” and “Insane in the Membrane…” Gonzo knew he had it and when you know, you don’t take a moment to reflect on your talent… You score every point you can…
While the aforesaid five selections were exemplary, Gonzo’s signature moment occurred only moments prior to my exit… With a crushed dance floor, Gonzo spun “Sugar” and the bunnies exploded… From floor level, the energy was as intense as any moment I have experienced… It rivaled when Donnie Wahlberg sang… The combination of crowd, skill, and sound were perfect….
The chorus, ripped from a regrettable pop song of this decade, echoed and you couldn’t not hear the screams… The entire evening, I had wondered would Gonzo receive the crowd he warranted? I concluded the evening at floor level, watching this crowd thank him for his skill… Gonzo may have had a triple digit temperature, but he contrasted it with unfathomable triple digit talent…
Natural Successes
Essentially, alcoholic concoctions are universal. In their backyard, anyone can merge champagne and orange juice. In their basement, anyone can mix a martini. But, confronted by a dozen screaming patrons, only a few can simultaneously sustain their sanity and skill. These few are natural slingers.
Upon my arrival for Where in Columbus is Bucky the Bear, Lodge Bar was buzzing. The relaxed atmosphere and scattered conversation were perfect compliments for the early evening’s sun soaked weather. Weather which, while I am certain everyone enjoyed it, assumedly enticed away more customers than it contributed…
Since I mentioned perfect and enticing, I was within Lodge Bar’s confines for five minutes before Promotions Superstar and Natural Slinger Kattie Minx acquired my attention. Minx possesses a dozen desirable qualities… Yet, the one that attracts you the most, the one that sells her the most is she is a contradiction… Seriously… She is simple and elegant… She is effortless and exquisite…
We speak for ten minutes, every second of which her eighteen carat eyes sparkle and her thirty-six carat smile, which could light the Arena District, is evident… You wish you could turn the ten minute conversation into two hours… Minx is a delight, she is a talent, she is a hot buttered biscuit…
Speaking of hot buttered biscuits, Crown Princess Kadi was also present this evening… What I appreciate about scattered crowds is that they provide a chance to speak with the superstars and honestly, I can’t speak with Kadi enough… Every conversation, regardless of where it commences includes seven subsequent topics… They include articulate analysis and unfiltered truth… When they conclude, I always wish the next conversation could commence immediately…
From Kadi, I transition into another conversation, actually an intelligence exchange with Lodge Bar DJ Michael… I know what you’re thinking… I led with drink slingers… I’ve discussed two drink slingers… Why am I inserting a mixer into the middle of this menagerie? I will explain…
Conversation is sparring… You don’t ask a question, receive an answer, and shut up… You ask a question, the other person answers quickly, you respond, they respond, you react, and they react… Michael can spar with anyone… Our conversation ranges from discussing “Words that Work” to how Steve Rubell influenced my writing to several song lyrics, which both of us recite from memory… The free flow of dialogue is exhilarating…
Michael’s spin skills are impressive also… I know I discussed his penchant for playing appropriate music, but his own repertoire merits another stratum of respect… From “Nine in the Afternoon” to “Santa Monica,” Michael’s range was incredible… These weren’t random tracks severed for people who weren’t paying attention… These were brilliant background…
While Michael provided ambiance for the main room, Lodge Bar’s patio provided a separate exceptional environment… If you relocated everyone inside, the main room would have been swarmed… With that said, I cannot question those who preferred their conversation and cocktails amidst sun soaked scenery…
I will simply remind them as they read this column that they missed the Bucky the Bear contest, which included phenomenal prizes such as Third Eye Blind tickets, Crew and Clippers tickets… I honestly wish this contest would have had more participants… The concept was outstanding and the photos, which could have been bland, were anything but bland… This contest merited fifty entrants, instead of the fifteen I believe participated…
As the contest concluded and I traversed the steps toward Vine Street, I encountered an intriguing situation… A forty person party was set to enter, but didn’t when the lead bunny was told the cover charge would not be waved… She cursed Lodge Bar as a “sh=t hole” and the party exited…
This is what I mean when I stated that only a few can simultaneously sustain their sanity and skill. If this was a backyard or basement, that bunny would have received retaliation…
Upon my arrival for Where in Columbus is Bucky the Bear, Lodge Bar was buzzing. The relaxed atmosphere and scattered conversation were perfect compliments for the early evening’s sun soaked weather. Weather which, while I am certain everyone enjoyed it, assumedly enticed away more customers than it contributed…
Since I mentioned perfect and enticing, I was within Lodge Bar’s confines for five minutes before Promotions Superstar and Natural Slinger Kattie Minx acquired my attention. Minx possesses a dozen desirable qualities… Yet, the one that attracts you the most, the one that sells her the most is she is a contradiction… Seriously… She is simple and elegant… She is effortless and exquisite…
We speak for ten minutes, every second of which her eighteen carat eyes sparkle and her thirty-six carat smile, which could light the Arena District, is evident… You wish you could turn the ten minute conversation into two hours… Minx is a delight, she is a talent, she is a hot buttered biscuit…
Speaking of hot buttered biscuits, Crown Princess Kadi was also present this evening… What I appreciate about scattered crowds is that they provide a chance to speak with the superstars and honestly, I can’t speak with Kadi enough… Every conversation, regardless of where it commences includes seven subsequent topics… They include articulate analysis and unfiltered truth… When they conclude, I always wish the next conversation could commence immediately…
From Kadi, I transition into another conversation, actually an intelligence exchange with Lodge Bar DJ Michael… I know what you’re thinking… I led with drink slingers… I’ve discussed two drink slingers… Why am I inserting a mixer into the middle of this menagerie? I will explain…
Conversation is sparring… You don’t ask a question, receive an answer, and shut up… You ask a question, the other person answers quickly, you respond, they respond, you react, and they react… Michael can spar with anyone… Our conversation ranges from discussing “Words that Work” to how Steve Rubell influenced my writing to several song lyrics, which both of us recite from memory… The free flow of dialogue is exhilarating…
Michael’s spin skills are impressive also… I know I discussed his penchant for playing appropriate music, but his own repertoire merits another stratum of respect… From “Nine in the Afternoon” to “Santa Monica,” Michael’s range was incredible… These weren’t random tracks severed for people who weren’t paying attention… These were brilliant background…
While Michael provided ambiance for the main room, Lodge Bar’s patio provided a separate exceptional environment… If you relocated everyone inside, the main room would have been swarmed… With that said, I cannot question those who preferred their conversation and cocktails amidst sun soaked scenery…
I will simply remind them as they read this column that they missed the Bucky the Bear contest, which included phenomenal prizes such as Third Eye Blind tickets, Crew and Clippers tickets… I honestly wish this contest would have had more participants… The concept was outstanding and the photos, which could have been bland, were anything but bland… This contest merited fifty entrants, instead of the fifteen I believe participated…
As the contest concluded and I traversed the steps toward Vine Street, I encountered an intriguing situation… A forty person party was set to enter, but didn’t when the lead bunny was told the cover charge would not be waved… She cursed Lodge Bar as a “sh=t hole” and the party exited…
This is what I mean when I stated that only a few can simultaneously sustain their sanity and skill. If this was a backyard or basement, that bunny would have received retaliation…
Friday, May 15, 2009
INVITE: Rock on the Range Pre-Parties
Commencement: 3:00Conclusion: 6:00
Venue: McFadden’s (South Campus)
Rock on the Range Ticket Contest
Free Crew Stadium Concert Shuttle
Complementary Ultimate Vodka Drinks
Drinks (Available All Night)
$2.50 Bud Light
INVITE: U Weekly Cornhole Tournament
Commencement: 5:00Conclusion: 8:00
Venue: Hampton’s (250 King Avenue)
Cost: $10
Reservations: U Weekly
Winners Receive: $200 Prize Package
INVITE: Sexy Saturdays
Commencement: 10:00Venue: Sugar Bar (525 Park Street)
VIP Access: Text (406-3072)
Mezzanine Drinks (Available 10:30 – 11:30 p.m.)
$1 Top Shelf Drinks
Quick Read
Chrysler’s cuts are an appropriate lead… And a trio of reporters provide excellent coverage of Anthony Gutierrez’s indictment.
Cool Kids, Sugar Bar Enjoy, Exude “It”
When I am writing, I know when I have it. When I enter a venue, I know if they have it. It is exclusive, incomprehensible, unequaled ability.
Upon my arrival at Sugar Bar, I knew they had it. The venue was crushed. It’s not as if I hadn’t ventured into the venue, past the awaiting masses previously. However, tonight’s awaiting masses consumed half a block. They occupied a complete sidewalk, a partial sidewalk, and an alley.
Inside Sugar Bar, the crowd was equally impressive. The lower mezzanine and dance floor were crushed. The couch klatch was swarmed. As I have said, Sugar Bar’s best nights are defined through impassability and this evening once again reaffirmed that formula… If one entered and immediately settled upon a prime dance floor position, they should not sacrifice it…
Amidst observing this crush, I spoke with several Sugar Bar superstars and the topic most broached was why this evening exceeded the previous evening… Everyone agreed the weather was the principal reason… However, two other possible factors surprised me… Wednesday night was blamed (as if to compensate for the promoters) and the popularity of the Cool Kids over Fall Out Boy was highlighted… Fall Out Boy is a Grammy nominated group with three Hot 100 singles… The Cool Kids are two artists with a My Space page… You explain it…
One aspect, which required zero explanation, was the dance floor, which was crushed from commencement to conclusion… From the stage, which alternated bunny clutches seemingly every five minutes to several corners to the railing below the upper mezzanine… The energy, exuded by the bunnies and stimulated by the bunny chasers, was palpable…
Since I mentioned bunnies, the population of the primping sex was extremely scattered… Everyone’s heard that phrase that includes the words “there is a fine line between…” Tonight, there wasn’t a fine line… There was a gorge which required air travel… The contrast between the bunnies and their potentially branded cattle opposites was striking…
The bunnies who were present were spectacular… The silver charm bunny, clad in a shimmering black and ice dress, who I saw dancing in a minimum of three locations… The pair of blue bunnies who owned the upper mezzanine’s cage… The stripes over teal bunny, who appeared on the stage twice… The off white bunny, who danced close enough below the mezzanine that I could touch her…
Each were exemplary… Unfortunately, their counterparts were as random as the musical selections of DJ EV (I’ll return to him in a moment)… The heifers were not apocryphal… They were not hideous as the previous evening… They simply stole attention from the clutches where the attention should have been… They sought the spotlight, when the spotlight had settled upon someone else…
Speaking of the spotlight and a spotlight stealer… Throughout the evening, Sugar Bar flirted with their Donnie Wahlberg attendance… As I listened to music, I wondered how… DJ EV was mixing and spinning the most random mess since John McCain and Sarah Palin… Seventies songs… Eighties songs… “First of the Month” as a dance song… This only succeeds if the dance includes several shots at shot range…
Approximately midnight, the Cool Kids and their entourage arrived… Exactly as Fall Out Boy only twenty-four hours earlier, the duo was interactive and relaxed… They consumed alcohol, they grinded on bunnies, they toasted each other, they grinded on more bunnies… The duo never considered for a moment that they were the superstars… They simply devoured the adulation and attention…
Adulation and attention which emanated from the bunnies and bunny chasers which crushed the floor and the lower mezzanine and from the Cool Kid’s entourage, who took over the upper mezzanine… If Fall Out Boy enjoyed every moment of their interaction with this city, the Cool Kids enjoyed every second and they likely could have enjoyed additional hours…
While the ease of the Cool Kids’ crowd interaction slightly surprised me, their wardrobes surprised no one… A Detroit Pistons last decade “Bad Boys” shirt… An old Cleveland Cavaliers logo hat… An old Cleveland Cavaliers logo shirt… Four Cleveland Indians hats, each of which had a different logo… The ensembles were unsurprising and yet shocking simultaneously….
Now, I expect random and potentially ridiculous fashion from rappers… However, the frequency of this city’s random and overtly ridiculous fashion is nauseating me… Columbus needs a stylist… We need someone outside the entrance of every venue, who can be responsible for advising those who should have stepped outside their door, let alone attempted entry into a nightclub….
Since citywide stylists are likely an impossibility, allow me to craft some rules (and please pay attention)… If the outfit contains a sports logo more than three years old, do not wear it… If the outfit is a woefully out of date style, do not wear it… If the answer to the question, would my mother wear this, is yes, do not wear it… Do not, do not, do not wear any item that slips into one of these three categories (and honestly, there are another dozen categories that I could name, but I don’t have that kind of time)…
With inside one hour remaining until the venue closed, Kid Cudi stepped to the microphone… His words were not monumental… His words were more like a checklist to induce sound… Shout Out Lebron James (check)… Say you love Ohio (check)… Throw in some references that most won’t understand, such as a Honda Accord (check)… Scream (check)… Make the audience scream (double check)…
Cudi’s ambition was not a memorable sound bite… Cudi’s words were simply an appearance requirement… He appeared much more comfortable singing and grinding on one of the Sugar Bar dancers, who intriguingly was dressed in camouflage for the evening…
As Cudi spoke, the audience appeared only semi-interested… They continued their conversations… Some snapped pictures… But, the swarm of digital flashes was nothing when compared with Wahlberg… On that evening, the audience could have permanently blinded a herd of moose with their cameras… On this evening, the brightness was merely a momentary distraction…
With approximately fifteen minutes remaining in the evening, Sugar Bar Owner Chris Corso and Promotions Superstar Tori made their appearances… Dressed in elegant black and white, Tori appeared worth her typical eighteen carats… We hugged and shared our first conversation in two months… It didn’t take a conversation to remind me why I adore this bunny… Tori is the conversation you wait your evening for and the friend you wait your life for…
As electricity slowly scattered the intoxicated from their grinding into the night air, I stood in upper mezzanine, staring toward the vacant dance floor… Only moments prior, that dance floor and this venue had it… They already want it back…
Upon my arrival at Sugar Bar, I knew they had it. The venue was crushed. It’s not as if I hadn’t ventured into the venue, past the awaiting masses previously. However, tonight’s awaiting masses consumed half a block. They occupied a complete sidewalk, a partial sidewalk, and an alley.
Inside Sugar Bar, the crowd was equally impressive. The lower mezzanine and dance floor were crushed. The couch klatch was swarmed. As I have said, Sugar Bar’s best nights are defined through impassability and this evening once again reaffirmed that formula… If one entered and immediately settled upon a prime dance floor position, they should not sacrifice it…
Amidst observing this crush, I spoke with several Sugar Bar superstars and the topic most broached was why this evening exceeded the previous evening… Everyone agreed the weather was the principal reason… However, two other possible factors surprised me… Wednesday night was blamed (as if to compensate for the promoters) and the popularity of the Cool Kids over Fall Out Boy was highlighted… Fall Out Boy is a Grammy nominated group with three Hot 100 singles… The Cool Kids are two artists with a My Space page… You explain it…
One aspect, which required zero explanation, was the dance floor, which was crushed from commencement to conclusion… From the stage, which alternated bunny clutches seemingly every five minutes to several corners to the railing below the upper mezzanine… The energy, exuded by the bunnies and stimulated by the bunny chasers, was palpable…
Since I mentioned bunnies, the population of the primping sex was extremely scattered… Everyone’s heard that phrase that includes the words “there is a fine line between…” Tonight, there wasn’t a fine line… There was a gorge which required air travel… The contrast between the bunnies and their potentially branded cattle opposites was striking…
The bunnies who were present were spectacular… The silver charm bunny, clad in a shimmering black and ice dress, who I saw dancing in a minimum of three locations… The pair of blue bunnies who owned the upper mezzanine’s cage… The stripes over teal bunny, who appeared on the stage twice… The off white bunny, who danced close enough below the mezzanine that I could touch her…
Each were exemplary… Unfortunately, their counterparts were as random as the musical selections of DJ EV (I’ll return to him in a moment)… The heifers were not apocryphal… They were not hideous as the previous evening… They simply stole attention from the clutches where the attention should have been… They sought the spotlight, when the spotlight had settled upon someone else…
Speaking of the spotlight and a spotlight stealer… Throughout the evening, Sugar Bar flirted with their Donnie Wahlberg attendance… As I listened to music, I wondered how… DJ EV was mixing and spinning the most random mess since John McCain and Sarah Palin… Seventies songs… Eighties songs… “First of the Month” as a dance song… This only succeeds if the dance includes several shots at shot range…
Approximately midnight, the Cool Kids and their entourage arrived… Exactly as Fall Out Boy only twenty-four hours earlier, the duo was interactive and relaxed… They consumed alcohol, they grinded on bunnies, they toasted each other, they grinded on more bunnies… The duo never considered for a moment that they were the superstars… They simply devoured the adulation and attention…
Adulation and attention which emanated from the bunnies and bunny chasers which crushed the floor and the lower mezzanine and from the Cool Kid’s entourage, who took over the upper mezzanine… If Fall Out Boy enjoyed every moment of their interaction with this city, the Cool Kids enjoyed every second and they likely could have enjoyed additional hours…
While the ease of the Cool Kids’ crowd interaction slightly surprised me, their wardrobes surprised no one… A Detroit Pistons last decade “Bad Boys” shirt… An old Cleveland Cavaliers logo hat… An old Cleveland Cavaliers logo shirt… Four Cleveland Indians hats, each of which had a different logo… The ensembles were unsurprising and yet shocking simultaneously….
Now, I expect random and potentially ridiculous fashion from rappers… However, the frequency of this city’s random and overtly ridiculous fashion is nauseating me… Columbus needs a stylist… We need someone outside the entrance of every venue, who can be responsible for advising those who should have stepped outside their door, let alone attempted entry into a nightclub….
Since citywide stylists are likely an impossibility, allow me to craft some rules (and please pay attention)… If the outfit contains a sports logo more than three years old, do not wear it… If the outfit is a woefully out of date style, do not wear it… If the answer to the question, would my mother wear this, is yes, do not wear it… Do not, do not, do not wear any item that slips into one of these three categories (and honestly, there are another dozen categories that I could name, but I don’t have that kind of time)…
With inside one hour remaining until the venue closed, Kid Cudi stepped to the microphone… His words were not monumental… His words were more like a checklist to induce sound… Shout Out Lebron James (check)… Say you love Ohio (check)… Throw in some references that most won’t understand, such as a Honda Accord (check)… Scream (check)… Make the audience scream (double check)…
Cudi’s ambition was not a memorable sound bite… Cudi’s words were simply an appearance requirement… He appeared much more comfortable singing and grinding on one of the Sugar Bar dancers, who intriguingly was dressed in camouflage for the evening…
As Cudi spoke, the audience appeared only semi-interested… They continued their conversations… Some snapped pictures… But, the swarm of digital flashes was nothing when compared with Wahlberg… On that evening, the audience could have permanently blinded a herd of moose with their cameras… On this evening, the brightness was merely a momentary distraction…
With approximately fifteen minutes remaining in the evening, Sugar Bar Owner Chris Corso and Promotions Superstar Tori made their appearances… Dressed in elegant black and white, Tori appeared worth her typical eighteen carats… We hugged and shared our first conversation in two months… It didn’t take a conversation to remind me why I adore this bunny… Tori is the conversation you wait your evening for and the friend you wait your life for…
As electricity slowly scattered the intoxicated from their grinding into the night air, I stood in upper mezzanine, staring toward the vacant dance floor… Only moments prior, that dance floor and this venue had it… They already want it back…
Always Live
Arena District spies inform me that Lodge Bar was crushed. Evidently, the venue retained it’s title.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Dann Disciple Charged
NBC 4: A top aide to former Ohio Attorney General Marc Dann was charged on 10 counts Thursday. Franklin County Prosecutor Ron O’Brien announced the charges against Anthony Gutierrez at a 2 p.m. press conference.
The charges include one count of theft in office, two counts of unauthorized use of property, two counts of receiving improper compensation, one count of prohibited election activities, one count of filing a false statement and three counts of worker’s compensation fraud. Gutierrez, 50, faces six felonies, as much as eight years in custody and $19,000 in fines.
Gutierrez allegedly used state equipment and employees to operate his construction business on state time. It was also alleged he received extra compensation in the form of rent and utilities at both a Dublin condo and a Victorian Village residence.
Gutierrez is also accused of underreporting the number of employees at his company to avoid paying premiums. O’Brien said the investigation is not complete and others could be charged. He would not comment on names. “He has, I would say, to date cooperated with the investigation and for that reason, we will not request that a bond be set such that would keep him in confinement. So I expect him and his lawyer to surrender on Monday,“ O’Brien said.
Gutierrez was the central figure in a pair of sexual harassment complaints by two female employees of Dann’s office that ultimately resulted in Dann’s resignation in May 2008. Gutierrez was fired in May 2008 after an internal investigation concluded he violated the office’s sexual harassment policy.
Dann, a Democrat, later resigned and admitted that he had an extramarital affair with an employee. He was elected in 2006 on an anti-corruption platform. Thursday marked the one-year anniversary of Dann’s resignation.
The charges include one count of theft in office, two counts of unauthorized use of property, two counts of receiving improper compensation, one count of prohibited election activities, one count of filing a false statement and three counts of worker’s compensation fraud. Gutierrez, 50, faces six felonies, as much as eight years in custody and $19,000 in fines.
Gutierrez allegedly used state equipment and employees to operate his construction business on state time. It was also alleged he received extra compensation in the form of rent and utilities at both a Dublin condo and a Victorian Village residence.
Gutierrez is also accused of underreporting the number of employees at his company to avoid paying premiums. O’Brien said the investigation is not complete and others could be charged. He would not comment on names. “He has, I would say, to date cooperated with the investigation and for that reason, we will not request that a bond be set such that would keep him in confinement. So I expect him and his lawyer to surrender on Monday,“ O’Brien said.
Gutierrez was the central figure in a pair of sexual harassment complaints by two female employees of Dann’s office that ultimately resulted in Dann’s resignation in May 2008. Gutierrez was fired in May 2008 after an internal investigation concluded he violated the office’s sexual harassment policy.
Dann, a Democrat, later resigned and admitted that he had an extramarital affair with an employee. He was elected in 2006 on an anti-corruption platform. Thursday marked the one-year anniversary of Dann’s resignation.
INVITE: Where is Bucky the Bear?
Commencement: 5:00Venue: Lodge Bar (Arena District)
Reservations: Lodge Bar
Contest Prizes
Clippers Tickets
Crew Tickets
Resteraunt Gift Cards
Zoo Passes
Drinks (Available All Night)
$5 Bucky Bombs
$5 Stinger Bombs
$1.50 Pitchers
INVITE: Best Web Party
Commencement: 10:00Venue: Sugar Bar (525 Park Street)
Giovanni Body Art Show
Mezzanine Drinks (Available 11 p.m. – Midnight)
$1 Top Shelf Drinks
Number Sixty-Eight
NBC 4: Homicide detectives were called to a home on the city’s far east side after a man was found shot to death. Police were called to the scene in the 3700 block of Brice Road Thursday afternoon… The victim, a man in his 50s, was found shot on the first floor of his home, police said.
According to investigators, the victim was found by a relative who was checking on his well-being. Police said that on Tuesday afternoon, four black men were seen speeding away from the home in a black Ford Taurus. No further description of the men was available.
According to investigators, the victim was found by a relative who was checking on his well-being. Police said that on Tuesday afternoon, four black men were seen speeding away from the home in a black Ford Taurus. No further description of the men was available.
Quick Read
Thursday’s front page is ridiculous… Barn refurbishing trumps Ohio’s latest employment statistics? Barn refurbishing trumps our city’s budget conflict? At least, President Obama’s Iraq photo decision was above the fold… beside the barn refurbishing…
Sports is equally muddled, leading with the Cleveland Cavaliers and Pittsburgh Penguins… The section should have led with Bob Baptist’s profile of surprise Memorial invitee Chris Wilson…
The Weekender is the lone bright spot with it’s feature on Rock on the Range (which we will cover on Saturday)…
Sports is equally muddled, leading with the Cleveland Cavaliers and Pittsburgh Penguins… The section should have led with Bob Baptist’s profile of surprise Memorial invitee Chris Wilson…
The Weekender is the lone bright spot with it’s feature on Rock on the Range (which we will cover on Saturday)…
BREAKING: Columbus Duo Score XM Show
WNCI’s Gonzo and Nate Tyler will join XM Radio, starting next week. Kiss XM 21, which airs today’s hottest hits, will broadcast the tandem’s program in an unannounced timeslot. Kiss XM 21 is operated by Clear Channel, the parent company of WNCI.
I Stood Five Feet From Someone In Fall Out Boy And All I Got Was This Stupid Column
Prominence is important. Proximity to prominence is imperative. Not everyone can be prominent. Not everyone can possess access or contacts. Befriending someone of prominence, ingratiating yourself within their circle, affords importance, opportunity, and reputation. (And before anyone writes complaining that the title insults Fall Out Boy, Sugar Bar, or the evening, the title is a play on a Fall Out Boy song)…
Within thirty minutes of my arrival (some of which was twittered, some of which was not), Park Street Patio and Sugar were swarmed with stars… The Famed Four, Co-Owners Chris Corso, Mike Gallichio, and Brian Swanson and Promotions Superstar Randy Haffey were expected… R Bar Co-Owners Mike and Natalie Darr, who were seated at a table in the lower mezzanine, were not… McFadden’s General Manager Damien Fuller, who was enjoying a drink, was not…
Also not expected was Onyx Promotions Superstar and Nightlife Notable Randee, who I encountered as she stood flummoxed, unable to cross between venues… Why was she unable to cross? Sugar’s security person was carrying out his assignment (also known as acting like an…)… Randee and I spoke for five minutes, as she waited, discussing her upcoming Models and Moguls event, Onyx Thursday and Saturday evenings, and city buzz…
Finally, she was allowed to traverse the hallway between Sugar Bar and Park Street Patio… I’ll return to discussing her in moments, but for this moment, let me address a previous sentence… Sugar Bar’s security people are professional and I understand they have responsibilities… However, people skills wouldn’t injure them and they aren’t that hard to master…
A craft which is hard to master is mixing… However, Gonzo has succeeded… I encountered the national sensation in Park Street Patio, as he celebrated his nationwide syndication and prepared for the other half of the Fall Out Boy After Party… Gonzo’s peppiness, which normally can exhaust red bull, was obvious this evening… It’s not as if anyone ever questioned his talent, but this announcement (which you can read above if you haven’t already) was validation he has always deserved…
After twenty minutes of watching Gonzo dart between activities and darting between activities myself, DJ Triple A, Randee, and myself convened below Park Street Patio’s stage… Intermittently, Gonzo joined the conversation as we discussed the evening and various venues… I’m certain I’ve said this previously, but if I haven’t I should have… The access to these conversations, the camaraderie between the Generation 1 a.m. working set is the only reward I will ever require from this occupation…
Speaking of rewards, the Ultimate Vodka Party was a perfect diversion as both Park Street Patio and Sugar Bar awaited Fall Out Boy’s arrival. I was told (and I cant imagine this is true) that the Ultimate Vodka Party was the evening’s attraction, that Pete Wentz and company were merely an occurrence… I assume some of the venue superstars who I have mentioned appeared strictly for research… Yet, I can’t fathom someone planning their evening out around an alcohol and not a celebrity…
What I also can’t fathom is doughnut holes, an item which cost $2.50 (not $1.77 as I twittered), as a venue desert item… Apparently, Corso can… We sample the moist morsels, which are scrumptious (would I pay what he wants to charge, likely not) and discuss the NBA and NHL playoffs… In his estimation, the Detroit Red Wings win game seven over Anaheim…
In my estimation, this crowd was not Sugar Bar’s most iconic… I twittered every second of Brody Jenner and Donnie Wahlberg’s appearances… Jenner’s included marginally passable walkways and limited dance floor and mezzanine space…. Wahlberg’s crushed every area with only a minimal walkway on the stairs… Tonight, the upper mezzanine and couch area were swarmed… The lower mezzanine and dance floor were merely buzzed…
Now, I know what you’re thinking… I’m not using the word crushed, because I am judging Sugar Bar on the basis of those other two events… I am and I won’t apologize for this… The thing about expectations is that when you perform well, they increase and you have to match them… Why not simply decrease expectations? Because that’s not the way expectations work… Performers who perform must perform or sentences as were typed above get typed…
Am I labeling Sugar Bar’s evening a failure? I am not… I am simply stating the obvious… This crowd did not match previous productions and thus, did not meet expectations… The evening was exemplary… It was one worthy of praise and a lengthy column (which you are reading right now)… However, Jenner topped other nights and Walhberg topped Jenner… This topped neither…
Following two hours, one hundred stars, and a dozen scary heifers (we’ll talk crowd composition shortly, I know you’re awaiting my opinion), Fall Out Boy arrived… Unlike Jenner and Walhberg, the crowd didn’t suffocate them… A Secret Service phalanx wasn’t required… I attribute this to Fall Out Boy’s appearance (if you have ever seen them, they blend into their generation comfortably) and their affability with the crowd…
Jenner adored the attention, but still set himself apart… Kourtney Kardashian could have not spoken to a single person and been thrilled… Fall Out Boy mingled, they danced, they didn’t appear to be genuinely enjoying themselves, they were genuinely enjoying themselves… They are and were twenty-five plus year old males with influence, money, and power… And yet they acted as if they were four twenty-five plus year old males who would attend class at Ohio State this morning…
I promised we’d discuss crowd composition and I want to state right now, before you continue reading, that I may offend anyone even if you aren’t one of the people I directly reference… Wednesday’s crowd possessed some bunnies and they were gorgeous…. Unfortunately, the bulk (and the use of that word is intentional) of the crowd was heifers… And I’m not talking the heifers who I usually assail… I’m talking heifers large enough to feed third world nations for decades, five of which, three in black, one in teal, and one in blue, could have formed an offensive line that any running back could have hidden behind for months…
They crowded Sugar Bar’s stage and turned it from normal paradise to nauseatingly putrid… The invaded the cage, grinding their flab until I wanted to puke… They plagued the dance floor and walkway, dancing and pretending as if no one could see them… I saw them… I assume everyone saw them and the image is enough to fill a half dozen trashcans with vomit… And that’s prior to anyone having even a sip of alcohol…
I know what I’ve said isn’t polite and if you abhorred that, you’ll loathe this… Don’t these plus size porpoises realize the obvious as they sit in front of their mirrors? Don’t they realize as they view all of their repulsiveness in their mirror that they have no friends for a reason… That their phones never ring for a reason… I have said it previously, I will say it again, heifers have a right to a social life, but why must they exercise this right? Why must they put us through this horror?
Life isn’t only for the gorgeous… And I’m sure I will have a volume of e-mail because of the last three paragraphs… But, I’m merely speaking honesty to obesity… The heifers I witnessed on this evening should comprehend why they were high school pariahs, college pariahs, and why they remain pariahs… Personality counts only in the case that appearance opens the door… I’m assuming these heifers have had more than a few doors slammed in their faces…
I had zero expectations as Pete Wentz entered the booth for his spin set at approximately one a.m. Obviously, he can write a song… He can play a song… But, could he equal the skills of DJ Samurai or Gonzo…. Would he even attempt this? As Wentz assumed control of the music, he wasn’t starved for attention… Every set of eyes in the venue, from the couch to the mezzanine to the floor was on him…
Now, I mentioned that this crowd was not equivalent to Wahlberg’s crush… What I did not mention was that has it’s advantages… Specifically, I was able to, with relative ease, traverse from the upper mezzanine to the right side of the booth, a simple jump from Wentz… The energy and the visual around him were incredible… I’ve always said that I judge a venue on energy, not on overall crowd size… The energy surrounding Wentz was exemplary…
If only the same could be said for his spinning precision… His song selection was spectacular... “Wonderwall,” “Don’t Stop Believing,” “99 Problems...” He had the crowd frenzied… With that said, I am an untrained evaluator and thus I sought several opinions when the performance concluded… The consensus of those who know what they are speaking of is that Wentz is a great celebrity and a lousy DJ…
As the evening concluded, Gonzo and I sat on the stage in Park Street Patio… This night for various persons and various reasons was triumphant… Not everyone could be considered a sweetheart and some (as I have typed) needed to simply drop dead… But, on this rare occasion, everyone was within steps of someone superior… Everyone, for a few hours, enjoyed proximately to prominence…
Within thirty minutes of my arrival (some of which was twittered, some of which was not), Park Street Patio and Sugar were swarmed with stars… The Famed Four, Co-Owners Chris Corso, Mike Gallichio, and Brian Swanson and Promotions Superstar Randy Haffey were expected… R Bar Co-Owners Mike and Natalie Darr, who were seated at a table in the lower mezzanine, were not… McFadden’s General Manager Damien Fuller, who was enjoying a drink, was not…
Also not expected was Onyx Promotions Superstar and Nightlife Notable Randee, who I encountered as she stood flummoxed, unable to cross between venues… Why was she unable to cross? Sugar’s security person was carrying out his assignment (also known as acting like an…)… Randee and I spoke for five minutes, as she waited, discussing her upcoming Models and Moguls event, Onyx Thursday and Saturday evenings, and city buzz…
Finally, she was allowed to traverse the hallway between Sugar Bar and Park Street Patio… I’ll return to discussing her in moments, but for this moment, let me address a previous sentence… Sugar Bar’s security people are professional and I understand they have responsibilities… However, people skills wouldn’t injure them and they aren’t that hard to master…
A craft which is hard to master is mixing… However, Gonzo has succeeded… I encountered the national sensation in Park Street Patio, as he celebrated his nationwide syndication and prepared for the other half of the Fall Out Boy After Party… Gonzo’s peppiness, which normally can exhaust red bull, was obvious this evening… It’s not as if anyone ever questioned his talent, but this announcement (which you can read above if you haven’t already) was validation he has always deserved…
After twenty minutes of watching Gonzo dart between activities and darting between activities myself, DJ Triple A, Randee, and myself convened below Park Street Patio’s stage… Intermittently, Gonzo joined the conversation as we discussed the evening and various venues… I’m certain I’ve said this previously, but if I haven’t I should have… The access to these conversations, the camaraderie between the Generation 1 a.m. working set is the only reward I will ever require from this occupation…
Speaking of rewards, the Ultimate Vodka Party was a perfect diversion as both Park Street Patio and Sugar Bar awaited Fall Out Boy’s arrival. I was told (and I cant imagine this is true) that the Ultimate Vodka Party was the evening’s attraction, that Pete Wentz and company were merely an occurrence… I assume some of the venue superstars who I have mentioned appeared strictly for research… Yet, I can’t fathom someone planning their evening out around an alcohol and not a celebrity…
What I also can’t fathom is doughnut holes, an item which cost $2.50 (not $1.77 as I twittered), as a venue desert item… Apparently, Corso can… We sample the moist morsels, which are scrumptious (would I pay what he wants to charge, likely not) and discuss the NBA and NHL playoffs… In his estimation, the Detroit Red Wings win game seven over Anaheim…
In my estimation, this crowd was not Sugar Bar’s most iconic… I twittered every second of Brody Jenner and Donnie Wahlberg’s appearances… Jenner’s included marginally passable walkways and limited dance floor and mezzanine space…. Wahlberg’s crushed every area with only a minimal walkway on the stairs… Tonight, the upper mezzanine and couch area were swarmed… The lower mezzanine and dance floor were merely buzzed…
Now, I know what you’re thinking… I’m not using the word crushed, because I am judging Sugar Bar on the basis of those other two events… I am and I won’t apologize for this… The thing about expectations is that when you perform well, they increase and you have to match them… Why not simply decrease expectations? Because that’s not the way expectations work… Performers who perform must perform or sentences as were typed above get typed…
Am I labeling Sugar Bar’s evening a failure? I am not… I am simply stating the obvious… This crowd did not match previous productions and thus, did not meet expectations… The evening was exemplary… It was one worthy of praise and a lengthy column (which you are reading right now)… However, Jenner topped other nights and Walhberg topped Jenner… This topped neither…
Following two hours, one hundred stars, and a dozen scary heifers (we’ll talk crowd composition shortly, I know you’re awaiting my opinion), Fall Out Boy arrived… Unlike Jenner and Walhberg, the crowd didn’t suffocate them… A Secret Service phalanx wasn’t required… I attribute this to Fall Out Boy’s appearance (if you have ever seen them, they blend into their generation comfortably) and their affability with the crowd…
Jenner adored the attention, but still set himself apart… Kourtney Kardashian could have not spoken to a single person and been thrilled… Fall Out Boy mingled, they danced, they didn’t appear to be genuinely enjoying themselves, they were genuinely enjoying themselves… They are and were twenty-five plus year old males with influence, money, and power… And yet they acted as if they were four twenty-five plus year old males who would attend class at Ohio State this morning…
I promised we’d discuss crowd composition and I want to state right now, before you continue reading, that I may offend anyone even if you aren’t one of the people I directly reference… Wednesday’s crowd possessed some bunnies and they were gorgeous…. Unfortunately, the bulk (and the use of that word is intentional) of the crowd was heifers… And I’m not talking the heifers who I usually assail… I’m talking heifers large enough to feed third world nations for decades, five of which, three in black, one in teal, and one in blue, could have formed an offensive line that any running back could have hidden behind for months…
They crowded Sugar Bar’s stage and turned it from normal paradise to nauseatingly putrid… The invaded the cage, grinding their flab until I wanted to puke… They plagued the dance floor and walkway, dancing and pretending as if no one could see them… I saw them… I assume everyone saw them and the image is enough to fill a half dozen trashcans with vomit… And that’s prior to anyone having even a sip of alcohol…
I know what I’ve said isn’t polite and if you abhorred that, you’ll loathe this… Don’t these plus size porpoises realize the obvious as they sit in front of their mirrors? Don’t they realize as they view all of their repulsiveness in their mirror that they have no friends for a reason… That their phones never ring for a reason… I have said it previously, I will say it again, heifers have a right to a social life, but why must they exercise this right? Why must they put us through this horror?
Life isn’t only for the gorgeous… And I’m sure I will have a volume of e-mail because of the last three paragraphs… But, I’m merely speaking honesty to obesity… The heifers I witnessed on this evening should comprehend why they were high school pariahs, college pariahs, and why they remain pariahs… Personality counts only in the case that appearance opens the door… I’m assuming these heifers have had more than a few doors slammed in their faces…
I had zero expectations as Pete Wentz entered the booth for his spin set at approximately one a.m. Obviously, he can write a song… He can play a song… But, could he equal the skills of DJ Samurai or Gonzo…. Would he even attempt this? As Wentz assumed control of the music, he wasn’t starved for attention… Every set of eyes in the venue, from the couch to the mezzanine to the floor was on him…
Now, I mentioned that this crowd was not equivalent to Wahlberg’s crush… What I did not mention was that has it’s advantages… Specifically, I was able to, with relative ease, traverse from the upper mezzanine to the right side of the booth, a simple jump from Wentz… The energy and the visual around him were incredible… I’ve always said that I judge a venue on energy, not on overall crowd size… The energy surrounding Wentz was exemplary…
If only the same could be said for his spinning precision… His song selection was spectacular... “Wonderwall,” “Don’t Stop Believing,” “99 Problems...” He had the crowd frenzied… With that said, I am an untrained evaluator and thus I sought several opinions when the performance concluded… The consensus of those who know what they are speaking of is that Wentz is a great celebrity and a lousy DJ…
As the evening concluded, Gonzo and I sat on the stage in Park Street Patio… This night for various persons and various reasons was triumphant… Not everyone could be considered a sweetheart and some (as I have typed) needed to simply drop dead… But, on this rare occasion, everyone was within steps of someone superior… Everyone, for a few hours, enjoyed proximately to prominence…
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Finally! Budget Forecast Improves
10 TV: The city's budget gap is shrinking dramatically, Columbus' director of finance said Wednesday. Joel Taylor said that the $16 million gap lowered for several reasons, including cutting police and fire overtime, not replacing city vehicles, and implementing five-day furloughs for city workers. Failing gas prices also helped, Taylor said. The city has spent less than they budgeted.
The cuts add up to $4.5 million. Instead of depleting the entire rainy day fund, all $5 million will be left, Taylor said. "It's certainly nice to see that the mayor's efforts to control spending are successful," Taylor said. "It doesn't change the fact that Columbus, like just about every other big city in this country, is facing very serious challenges."
The cuts add up to $4.5 million. Instead of depleting the entire rainy day fund, all $5 million will be left, Taylor said. "It's certainly nice to see that the mayor's efforts to control spending are successful," Taylor said. "It doesn't change the fact that Columbus, like just about every other big city in this country, is facing very serious challenges."
INVITE: Rock on the Range Pre-Parties
Calendar: May 16 & 17Commencement: 3:00
Conclusion: 6:00
Venue: McFadden’s (South Campus)
Rock on the Range Ticket Contest
Free Crew Stadium Concert Shuttle
Complementary Ultimate Vodka Drinks
Drinks (Available All Night)
$2.50 Bud Light
INVITE: Cool Kids After Party
Commencement: 10:00Venue: Sugar Bar (525 Park Street)
Age Range: Male (21 and over); Female (19 and over)
VIP Access: Text (406-3072)
Drinks (Available All Night)
$3 Martinis
$2 Bombs
$1 Wells
Appearance
Cool Kids
Are We Friends?
If not, why not? GCBUS Facebook is the destination for breaking news, event information, and exclusive updates. Simply search GCBUS or gossipcbus@gmail.com and friend us… You know you love me…
INVITE: U Weekly Cornhole Tournament
Calendar: May 16Commencement: 5:00
Conclusion: 8:00
Venue: Hampton’s (250 King Avenue)
Cost: $10
Reservations: U Weekly
Winners Receive: $200 Prize Package
INVITE: Free Beer Bikini Showcase
Calendar: May 18Commencement: 8:00
Conclusion: 11:00
Venue: No Tan Lines (1589 North High Street)
Age Range: Female (21 and over)
Free Beer & Bikini Showcase
INVITE: Ladies’ Night
Commencement: 9:00Venue: Onyx (1975 Henderson Road)
Women’s Specials (Available All Night)
$2.50 Pizzas
$1 Martinis
$1 Shots
Junior Achievement Requests Volunteers
If you are available to help us move tables, chairs, desks, etc. at any time this week or weekend during various two-hour shifts, please contact Wendy Postle by clicking on her name. Family, friends and colleagues are welcome, and you'll get the chance to take a tour of the facility as well!
Thursday (5/14), 9am-3pm
Shift #1 - 9am-11am
Shift #2 - 11am-1pm
Shift #3 - 1pm-3pm
Friday (5/15), 9am-3pm
Shift #1 - 9am-11am
Shift #2 - 11am-1pm
Shift #3 - 1pm-3pm
Saturday (5/16), 9am-5pm
Shift #1 - 9am-11am
Shift #2 - 11am-1pm
Shift #3 - 1pm-3pm
Shift #4 - 3pm-5pm
Thursday (5/14), 9am-3pm
Shift #1 - 9am-11am
Shift #2 - 11am-1pm
Shift #3 - 1pm-3pm
Friday (5/15), 9am-3pm
Shift #1 - 9am-11am
Shift #2 - 11am-1pm
Shift #3 - 1pm-3pm
Saturday (5/16), 9am-5pm
Shift #1 - 9am-11am
Shift #2 - 11am-1pm
Shift #3 - 1pm-3pm
Shift #4 - 3pm-5pm
Quick Read
Kevin Joy and Encarnacion Pyle type a pair of intriguing stories… Joy’s discussing the impact of the poor economy on summer camps… Pyle’s discussing universities welcoming veterans to their campuses…
Bob Hunter (sports) types an insipid piece on the Clippers responsibilities to the Cleveland Indians… Thanks Bob… I never knew stocking the Major League club was why the Triple A club existed…
Bob Hunter (sports) types an insipid piece on the Clippers responsibilities to the Cleveland Indians… Thanks Bob… I never knew stocking the Major League club was why the Triple A club existed…
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
INVITE: Pete Wentz
Commencement: 10:00Venue: Sugar Bar (525 Park Street)
Age Range: Male & Female (19 and over)
Cost: $10
VIP Access: Text (406-3072)
Ultimate Vodka Premiere Party
Complementary Ultimate Vodka Drinks
DJ Appearance
Pete Wentz (Fall Out Boy)
INVITE: Sports Monster Cornhole Tournament
Commencement: 7:00Venue: Lodge Bar (Arena District)
Champions Receive: Gift Cards & Prizes
Competitors Receive: T-Shirt
Drinks (Available 7 – 9 p.m.)
$4 Cherry Bombs
$3 Soco & Lime
$1 Mug refills
Sponsor
Sports Monster
INVITE: Beer Shot Game Night
Commencement: 8:00Venue: Spice Gastro Lounge (491 Park Street)
Competitions
Beer Pong (Tournament)
Cornhole
Fooseball (Tournament)
Flip Cup
Wii Bowling
Drinks (Available All Night)
$3 Bottles (16 ounces)
$3 Jack & Coke
$3 Mango Bombs
$3 Soco & Lime Shots
Co-Sponsors
Beta Pong
Ohio Beer Pong League
Quick Read
The front page is both eclectic and solid, featuring stories on Central Crossing’s pending cuts, an Ohio State teacher being honored, and ethanol plants… Robert Vitale (metro) contributes an excellent story on the city council setting the date for the income tax referendum, which should have led the front page…
Sports leads with the Cavs (again) and Bob Hunter contributes an outstanding editorial, which shreds the NHL… Life and Arts features an amusing piece on knothole gangs, also known as spectators who cant cough up three dollars to watch the Clippers from inside the stadium.
Sports leads with the Cavs (again) and Bob Hunter contributes an outstanding editorial, which shreds the NHL… Life and Arts features an amusing piece on knothole gangs, also known as spectators who cant cough up three dollars to watch the Clippers from inside the stadium.
Monday, May 11, 2009
INVITE: Pete Wentz
Commencement: 10:00Venue: Sugar Bar (525 Park Street)
Age Range: Male & Female (19 and over)
Cost: $10
VIP Access: Text (406-3072)
Ultimate Vodka Premiere Party
Complementary Ultimate Vodka Drinks
DJ Appearance
Pete Wentz (Fall Out Boy)
INVITE: Rock on the Range Pre-Parties
Calendar: May 16 & 17Commencement: 3:00
Conclusion: 6:00
Venue: McFadden’s (South Campus)
Rock on the Range Ticket Contest
Free Crew Stadium Concert Shuttle
Complementary Ultimate Vodka Drinks
Drinks (Available All Night)
$2.50 Bud Light
INVITE: Models & Moguls
Calendar: May 30Commencement: 3:00
Conclusion: 8:00
Venue: Onyx (1975 Henderson Road)
Cost: $9
Reservations: Randee Cook
Dress Raffle
Event Will Include
Agents
Artists
Designers
Entertainers
Models
Photographers
Promoters
Stylists
Quick Read
Monday’s front page is muddled… Bill Bush leads with a story on the decline of gas prices (I’m serious)… Theodore Decker types an entire story on convenience store violence and never actually examines the problem… And Encarnacion Pyle buries the fact that a state grant program, which he categorizes as a failure, has been deemed a success.
Metro’s front page is equally cluttered, with stories covering chickens, elephants, Ohio Dominican University, and a neighborhood block watch. Michael Arace (sports) mentions the Crew’s 0-2-5 start, but never discusses it’s origin… And Amy Saunders (Life and Arts) dreadfully misses an opportunity, utilizing few anecdotes and many clichés, when discussing Heather’s team.
Metro’s front page is equally cluttered, with stories covering chickens, elephants, Ohio Dominican University, and a neighborhood block watch. Michael Arace (sports) mentions the Crew’s 0-2-5 start, but never discusses it’s origin… And Amy Saunders (Life and Arts) dreadfully misses an opportunity, utilizing few anecdotes and many clichés, when discussing Heather’s team.
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