Appearances are my existence. The event invitations I receive entail celebrities, charities, city notables, premises, prizes, publicity, and various venues. Occasionally, they even include an aberrant subject.
Upon my arrival for the Vivid Video 25th Anniversary Celebration, I had scattered expectations. If anyone could present porn as a premiere vision, Owner Mike Gallichio and Promotions Superstars Randy Haffey and Shawn Money were the perfect trio. No one in this city can trump them for sensation. No one in this city can trump them for spectacle. Still, porn does not scream elite environment. Porn screams alone environment.
On Sugar Bar’s greatest nights, the employees and executives are not merely providers and purveyors. They join the party. They relish the party. Tonight, they were mostly invisible and scrambled. Their absence, their eyes, their frenetic texting spoke for this evening… Donnie Walhberg’s appearance was incomparable… Anything subsequent would have been a letdown… This subsequent was lethargic…
Not aiding, actually permanently maiming the event was the crowd that littered the upper and lower mezzanine, the dance floor, and the stripper pole area… They weren’t all horrific, in fact, a collection of bunnies scattered throughout the venue… Unfortunately, for every bunny, there was a minimum of one and occasionally three dirty, putrid things…
Their abnormal and multiple piercings, their overabundance of tattoos (including one demon that had his entire face inked) screamed societal reject… They screamed either eventual or previous incarceration… The bunnies were spectacular… But, they could not overcome the nightmare that surrounded them. They could not make invisible the collection, that I assume with certainty, reported to Satan at the end of the evening…
With every event, concept equals crowd. Mardi Gras enticed Freaks and Geeks… Walhberg enticed heifers (and for those who hate that term, please keep writing)… An adult video anniversary party enticed those who are inclined to watch adult videos… They should never, ever attend anywhere again…
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