Present As You Seek Infamy

Every evening, I ask myself one question… Where’s the news tonight?

On this evening, I thought that question could remain unanswered. The streets were vacant. The venues were vacant. Several churches and synagogues this weekend will have superior energy. Why was this? Park Street Festival was last weekend… Ohio State students have vanished… Opposing activities were occurring… Any reason is sensible… No reason is sufficient…

If you’ve read this website (and I know you have), Drink with a Lodge Bar employee night is an identifiable phrase. When last call echoed this evening, Lodge Bar employees were the only identifiable people… Trevor Day… Joe Information… Mike Material… The contingent was superb… However, Lodge Bar prefers this contingent’s alone presence prior to the venue opening…

While Lodge Bar’s night was regrettable, Matt Delight’s sentences were spectacular… He mocks his colleagues and this nation’s premiere comedy writers should applaud… He offers insight about the opposite sex and those who penned proverbs cringe… I know I typed he has never spent one second not amused with the thoughts in his own head… When those thoughts are spoken aloud, a column material encyclopedia is available…

Whereas Matt Delight was Lodge Bar’s lone highlight, Park Street Patio accrued their third consecutive victory. I know what you’re thinking… I said every venue was vacant and victory is utilized? This was not an evening when one venue survived an incomprehensible competition… Park Street Patio governed an evening when they were merely adequate…

Since our initial encounter, Jamie Precious has accrued four column appearances… You would assume one would run out of adjectives and then you realize the obvious… There are spectacular bunnies who are forgotten in five minutes and there are bunnies who speak for five minutes and are unforgettable… Jamie is the latter…

In a contrasting manner, Mia Charisma is another unforgettable slinger… Mia isn’t the precocious showcase… She isn’t the scandalous provocateur… She is simply an off the rack perfection… If the choice is the glitzy slinger who struts or the subdued slinger whose soul is visible within their eyes, Mia is the selection… Her soul is exquisite…

On Saturday, Lodge Bar Assistant General Manager Trevor Day raised expectations and won… Tonight, Sugar Bar Promotions Superstar Avi Primetime attempted a similar speculation… And speculation reestablished it’s definition… Sugar Bar was only buzzing… No section ever challenged or equaled swarmed…

And Sugar Bar’s evening deteriorated further… A fight ensued which included four security personnel, three randoms, two police officers, and a heifer in a tutu (and no that’s not the conclusion of a joke)… Conflicting reports exist concerning the scrap itself… According to witnesses, two women commenced fighting… Their boyfriends intervened… Security and police intervened… A Sugar Bar security person was inadvertently pepper sprayed in the mele…

Mia Charisma, Matt Delight, and Jamie Precious were excellent conversations… However, the preceding paragraph illustrates why my exit is never early… If I had learned about this incident via someone else, I would have remained regretful… I abhor missing the news…